A friend was telling me that her dog got really sick the past few months and then she figured out perhaps the dog is absorbing her stress which started almost at the same time the dog got sick. Then the moment a big project was over the dog naturally recovered.
I don't know about others but for me I thrive in happiness and feeling light and I shun negative people and steer clear of negative conversation whenever I can.
We only have so much energy in a day. Imagine waking up to a full bar of energy.
If we meet a drainer who is full of negativity your energy bar may be drained and depleted within no time.
I have been guilty of being a drainer a decade ago and I apologise to many who knew me at my worst and I truly am sorry for draining you guys so much to the extend I lost some relationships.
A drainer usually has these characteristics as per my observation:
1. "Woe is me" Mentality
The drainer always have a problem. He/she always like to repeat her problem to anyone who can listen, and with each telling of the problem, the drainer actually enjoys recounting it and got energised just by telling the problem to many people and got a rush of telling it. In the end the listener feels drained while the drainer went on to the next person to be the target listener and the draining process continues. Change the topic when the same old story is repeated or pretend you got a very important phone call to make or just tell it straight to her face enough of your problem can we focus on the beautiful thing over here/this happy news etc. Or just walk away.
2. A drainer is almost always negative
If five minutes into a conversation you find yourself feeling tired or sucked in, in a very negative way, take a step back and review the conversation. Chances are you got a drainer there. Try steering the conversation to a more positive tone or make it lighter in mood. If your attempts fail then move on and excuse yourself.
3. A drainer is self-centred
A drainer is always self-centred and hardly pay attention to what you are saying or if he/she hears you they are always thinking of what to say to steer the conversation back to them and them only. If you catch yourself doing that take note and refrain from monopolizing the conversation. I learned it the hard way and I thank many who have told me off or pointed out to me that the world doesn't revolve around me. You may lose the friendship for a bit but sooner or later if the time is ripe the drainer will realise it and perhaps may change for the better.
Do you know a drainer yourself or are you a drainer yourself? The energy that we exudes really matters. Are you positive enough today?
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